Broken

I fully believe Ernest Hemingway was right - we are all broken, and that brokenness is how the light gets in.

The past 12 months of my life have been challenging, for a variety of reasons both monumental (unexpected deaths) and mundane (fractured feet). Yesterday felt like yet another roller coaster ride, with global news about my religious denomination that will probably have far-reaching effects on the life of the church I call home.

I am not yet 40, but I feel as though I have hit mid-life, a time where being squeezed from all ends is common, tragedies are not unexpected, my body regularly falls apart, my children occasionally fall apart, and my multi-generational religious tradition might fall apart. I feel convicted that I have previously led a charmed life and have now realized life is broken, flawed, frail, fragile.

On my worst days, I feel broken. On my best days, though, I feel overwhelmed with how tender, beautiful, wonderful life can be. And while being broken has led to pain I had not previously experienced, this pain and brokenness leads to heightened empathy, sharpened emotions, deeper relationships, and a sense we are all connected in these tenacious bonds on earth.

Being broken and stripped raw is a scary, vulnerable, tender place. It is much easier to coast along and bounce from success to success, joy to joy. But being broken and feeling the light shining down in our cracks is one of the most authentic human experiences. And may we ultimately rise up from this brokenness even stronger than before.