10 Ways I am "Failing" and a Kickass Mom

[Sorry for the language in this post, Mom! I tried using a different term and it just didn't work.]

I think that it is so easy to think of all the ways we are "failing" in our role as a parent (or spouse, or friend, or worker, or....) that we forget to think about all of the ways that we are succeeding. For example, it only took me 32 seconds to come up with so many examples of ways that I am "failing" as a mom:

10. I accidentally locked Annika in the car in daycare when she was 2 years old. The fire department had to come rescue her. 

9. We are horrible at bathing the kids. We recently decided to start this "everyone gets a bath, every day" business. It lasted....one day. 

8. I once googled what level of uncleanliness your house had to have to be considered negligent. [Answer: It Depends.]

7. For being an accountant and an engineer, Will and I have to be two of the most unscheduled people ever. After years of parenting, we had the thought that maybe it wasn't ideal for the kids to have lunch at 11 a.m. one day and 2 p.m. the next. ;) 

And on and on and ON. And I would imagine that most people have lists like this. Everyone's list is different, but I think it is so easy to get caught up in all of the ways that we are falling short that we forget all of the ways we are not. 

A group of friends and I are currently having a great discussion about all the ways that we are each a kickass mom and it has been really inspiring, because we don't often stop to think about all of the ways that we must be succeeding in this crazy parenting gig. So here is my attempt to document things that I must be doing right, or at least not too wrong (which took way, WAY longer to compile than the other list).

6. As I told my friends, I am either a terrible or a kickass mom because I will often still snuggle with one of the kids in their bed until they fall asleep. I am going to own it and say kickass. :)

5. I read to the kids all the time, even though it is often past their bedtime (see point #6). 

4. I eat lunch regularly with the kids at school and they seem to love it. I just started doing this when Daniel was in preschool last year and with both of the kids in elementary school this year. I wish I had done it years ago. 

3. We have instituted "kid date night" this year, where each child spends one on one time with each parent. We haven't had as much time to do that since school started but it is definitely something they really look forward to in anticipation. 

2. I give the kids a lot of autonomy, from letting them wear whatever unmatched outfit they pick out, to giving them control over what we will do for kid date night, to encouraging them to express their opinions and feel that they have a voice.

1. I try hard. And ultimately, I think that is worth a lot. 

What would be on your list? What are all of the ways that you are a kickass mom/parent/spouse/friend/worker/you name it? Because we all are pretty kickass in our own way. 

Winning Weekend

Our family had a winning weekend all around - Julie won at marathon-ing, Will won at husband-ing, and I won at procrastinating. 

Julie Wins at Marathon-ing

Originally, Julie and Charlie were planning on flying in Detroit for Julie to run in the Detroit marathon; they were going to leave Friday and come back Monday, and we were going to watch Greg while they were gone (with nannies staying with him during the day when we had to work). However, poor Greg got sick on Thursday :(. A last-minute change of plans then ensued with Julie and I going up to Kansas City for her to run the marathon there, Charlie staying home with Sick Greg, and Will holding down the fort at home. 

This could only mean one thing....Sister Road Trip!! We hit the road to Kansas City after I was done lecturing on Friday afternoon. 

Despite the fact that it was October 18th, there was real live legitimate snow. This still boggles my mind. I still do not recall ever seeing snow this early before. 

We were a little worried about getting on the road in time to beat potential Kansas City traffic, but did not figure on getting stopped for about 20-30 minutes about 10 miles outside of Topeka (aka, Right Smack Dab in the Middle of Nowhere).

It turns out this was because of an "incident." We are still not sure what this "incident" was...

We made it to registration with plenty of time to spare! The Kansas City race was really popular this year (I think I heard around 12,000 entries total) and the half marathon had actually sold out. There were still plenty of spots in the full marathon, though. Julie thought the on site registration process was even easier than figuring out all of the lines to stand in if you had registered online.

View from the hotel! We managed to score a room in the race hotel even though it was last minute - so convenient.

That evening The Very Most Important Decision was deciding what race outfit to wear. The contention was either Shorts #1...

Or Shorts #2.

I agreed with Charlie and convinced Julie that Shorts #1 looked the fastest. :)

Bright and early on race morning! This whole race-day-hotel experience is new to me. Julie informed me that you have to go down and stand in the lobby with all of the other stressed-out runners for a while. :)

At the starting line! The wheelchair division began at 7:00 a.m., followed by the full and half marathon starting at 7:05 a.m. It was still dark.

Julie in her "throwaway" outfit. I was happy I could fulfill a useful function and keep clothes from being thrown away :). That is another thing Julie has taught me about races - never ever EVER do bag check. Judging by the insanely long line we saw people in for bag check afterward, that seems like a good plan.

The national anthem! The track for the song didn't quite work, so all of the runners started singing the words a Capella. It was very touching, and then the announcer must not have heard because he cut into everyone. :)

And they were off! The first part of the marathon goes up to downtown, right past the building where I used to work. I headed to where they swung back at the 2.5 mile mark, near Union Station. Here comes Julie!

Super blurry (and super speedy).

Union Station.

I walked to the other side of Liberty Memorial to try to catch Julie, but at mile 3.3, she was too speedy. :) I had fun watching other runners come by for quite a while and then headed back to the start, aka finish, where I got to see the speedy half marathoners come in. Other than being very cold (I eventually ended up wearing Julie's "throwaway" gear on top of my clothes) it was wonderful - I got to see so many people finish and hang out with different people after their race. So awesome! One of my "online friends" even waited with me to watch Julie finish. It was a little confusing with people finishing the half marathon and the marathon relay at the same time, but by keeping track of bibs we were able to see that when Julie crossed the line....she was the first place marathon female!!

You can see Julie in the red tank below.

A reporter from the Kansas City Star who had taken her picture talked to her in the finish area - he thought she was the first female, too.

Back in the hotel room! A much warmer place to pose. :)

Here is the picture that the reporter took!

And here is the actual article in the paper! It was a very nice article because not only did it mention how Julie was the "repeat winner," the headline mentioned the hills in the course. :)

Way to go, Julie!! We are all so very proud of you!

Will Wins at Husband-ing

I make no secret that Will Always Wins at Husband-ing, and this weekend illustrates why. First, I was scheduled to be in charge of cash at the elementary school carnival that night and Will was going to shepherd the kids around. This changed into Will being in charge of the cash (which was actually much harder than I thought - sorry, Will!!) and the kids shepherding themselves - now that Daniel is in kindergarten things seem so much easier in that regard. Oh. And the bounce houses might have helped. We are so thankful for our awesome friends who made carnival such a fun time for all of the kids this year!!

The next afternoon, Will took the kids to Spooktacular at the zoo, which is a giant pre-Halloween trick-or-treating event at the zoo. Daniel got to go as a ninja.

And Annika, inspired by Dragonvale, was a fierce dragon.

Somehow both of our kids have costumes with masks covering their faces? Hmm. Well, now that they are both in elementary school, they can practically take care of themselves. Just like Lord of the Flies...

Hay bales at the zoo! A great time was had by all and I have only stolen one piece of candy from a child's bucket (so far).

Will also held down the fort this afternoon while I went in for work for a few hours to attempt to dig myself out of my giant hole at work. Will rocks, but I'm sure everyone already knows that. :)

I Win at Procrastinating

I still have a zillion tax projects and homework to grade, all for tomorrow, but have I started any of it tonight? Noooo, because clearly updating the blog was far more pressing. I think this means that I win. :) 

Prairie Fire Half Report and Wichita Weekend

We had a great weekend in Wichita full of fun times at McDonald's, a public library inside a grocery store, playing with cousins, playing with friends at the park, visiting Chuck E. Cheese, and of course, running the Prairie Fire Half Marathon! Here are some of the highlights. 

Breakfast at McDonald's! As it turns out, it's not Cheers where everybody knows your name, it's the McDonald's at 21st and Rock. :) Mom and Aunt Carolyn are rocking the shades below. 

Daniel found a round table for our whole family. It was a great crew - my parents, Aunt Carolyn and Uncle John, and then all four of us.

I introduced the kids to one of the marvels of Wichita...a library inside a grocery store! Heaven.

We had to go in and check out books for the kids for the weekend.

Next it was on to Aunt Carolyn and Uncle John's house, where they have not one, not two, but THREE rooms exclusively devoted to playrooms. So wonderful! The kids can't wait to come back here for Christmas, especially since they suckered Aunt Carolyn into giving them beanie baby stuffed animals to take home. :)

Daniel and cousin Clara are near the same age and size and had a ball playing together!

Clara with her baby sister Saylor - so sweet.

The big reason we were in Wichita was to run the Prairie Fire Half Marathon! This is the event that used to be the Wichita Marathon, where Julie ran the marathon for years starting in 1999. I have such fond memories of watching the race and it is awesome to be a part of now that it has a new course. We headed to the expo to pick up our packets, where we ran into a teacher from the kids' schools and I got the best sticker ever to put up at work.

We moved from downtown Wichita to west Wichita to see my friend Miriam and to visit this Truly Awesome Playground at Sedgwick County Park.

Wichitans are kind of weird about sticking to the "east" or "west" side of town and I would have never known this existed if not for Miriam!

 Playing with the kids! Our kids match up very well in ages and interests.

Back to Grandma and Grandpa's house for...what else? More toys! The kids absolutely love the old Little People sets.

Will, my mom, and I made reservations to eat dinner at a fancy Italian restaurant nearby, Sweet Basil, where Will last went for his stepbrother Tony's graduation in 1989 and I last went before a homecoming dance in 1996.

Maybe it was because this was 15-20 years later or maybe it was because we ate at 5:30 p.m., but Will and I were the only ones in the entire restaurant under 50 years old the whole time we were there. My mom was definitely on the younger end, too. :)

Carb loading! Or should I say, cheese loading....

Meanwhile, my dad offered to take the kids to...Chuck E Cheese! It was entirely his idea and I am not sure he quite knew what he was giving himself into. ;) We all agreed that taking your grandchildren to this loud, sensory-overload place is a grandparent rite of passage.

Picture of Annika and Grandpa!

We met the gang after we finished eating since they were still going strong.

My parents also got to play skee ball for the first time, which is my very favorite part of the Chuck E Cheese experience.

We capped off the night with a visit to Braum's, my very favorite ice cream store. Where else can you get a waffle cone for only $1.35??!?

The next day was our big event....the Prairie Fire Half Marathon! Sadly, I did not take any pictures until we came home. It was an absolutely beautiful day and I loved the route full of so many old memories (running by my old high school, old park, old hospital I volunteered at...).

I ran with the 2:30 pace group until about mile 2, when I ended up ahead of them with some other runners. I met a really nice 5th grade teacher from Emporia whom I ran with until mile 8 or so, a really nice chemistry professor at Emporia State University whom I ran with until around mile 10, and then a really nice girl from Wichita whom I ran with through around mile 11. Around mile 12 I could still talk just fine but felt like my legs couldn't move at all, and the 2:30 pace group passed me. I ended up finishing in 2:30:18 and didn't have anything left to sprint at the end, but I am happy that I put in a good effort and had a PR with my fastest half yet!

It was so awesome having people to run with and talk to during the race. There was also wonderful crowd support lining the race with the best cheerleaders of all - the fam! My mom and the kids were there to see me around mile 6, and my dad was on his bike around mile 10 and then mile 12 toward the end.

Will ended up running so fast and having such a great race that our family missed cheering for him! He was originally thinking that he would try to break 2 hours, but ended up finishing in 1:45!! He ran almost the same pace in the half marathon as he did for the 10K race last month. Will said that doing the 25K trail race on the Konza two weeks ago made a big difference. Way to go, Will!!

Our children were happy that we each ran the race so that they could each get a finisher's medal from us. :)

 After the race, in my finisher's technical shirt!

Yay!

It was an awesome race and an awesome weekend in Wichita!

Our Weekends in Review

We have had lots of adventures these past four weekends!

Weekend #1 - Visited Kansas City! Daniel's dream came true and he finally, finally got to visit Worlds of Fun, after hearing Annika describe its awesomeness in great detail from her many trips there through Little Apple Day Camp. 

The next day, Will and I ran in the Plaza 10K race. I would highly recommend this race - very well organized and a great route. Will ran a 49:52, a new record! (This was also his first 10K race, but he was still blazing fast.)

We stayed with Nonnie and Pa but got to hang out with Grammy and Gramps on Sunday after the race. The kids then got to enjoy one of their favorite activities....fishing!

Weekend #2 - Relaxed at Home! After being gone the past three weekends in a row, it was great to have some time to chill and get caught up around the house. Oh. And I also convinced Julie to go shopping with me to buy make-up. ;)

The kids had so much fun with the fort that Will made at Rock Springs ranch that they made another one at our house when their friends came over.

The Thursday before the weekend, the whole family went to see Book 2 of the Intergalactic Nemesis Show: Robot Planet Rising! The kids loved it, just as they did Book 1 last year (Target: Earth).

Sunday evening we had our church's fall festival out at the Lazy T Ranch! It was an absolute blast and I wish I had taken more pictures. A couple of Annika's friends from mother/daughter book group also came with us!

Weekend #3 - Running and Celebrations! Saturday morning was the Body First Fitness Challenge out at Anneberg Park. I cannot say enough good things about this event. It is a fun run for kids that functions as a fundraiser for the local schools based on students' participation. Annika ran the 1/2 mile and Daniel ran the 1/4 mile and they both tried hard. :) And Bergman earned $868 and was the #4 school in total participation!

Right after the fun ran, we met at the Thorntons' house for a very special event...Greg's second birthday party!! I cannot believe he is two. He is just too adorable. I did not get a picture of this, but the cutest part of the day was seeing Greg push his much older cousins around the cul-de-sac in his new wagon. :) Happy Birthday, Greg!! We love you!

Sunday morning was a super exciting event...the inaugural Konquer the Konza 25k Trail Race!! This was a race held out at the Konza Prairie that Will ran with a bunch of the guys at church. Will did awesome, coming in at 2:27 (about a 9:31 pace for the 15.5 miles over a bunch of really hilly and uneven terrain), and did not get to claim the last place award that he had claimed would need to be pried from his cold, dead hands. ;) Great picture of the guys before and after the race!

Weekend #4 - Conference in San Diego! Well, for me, that is. ;) My plane left at 6:15 a.m. on Friday morning (thankfully in Manhattan that means that I did not actually leave the house until 5:20 a.m....), so I got to see a very special 4th grade performance of Annie on Thursday night. Annika was an orphan (without the boa) and a servant (with the boa).

I arrived in beautiful San Diego Friday morning for one of my favorite conferences with some of my favorite people...great friends, great sessions, and great weather! The hotel where I said and where the conference was held was also super fancy and unique.

While I was gone, the family did awesome things, like eat apple slices without the peel.

And draw pictures. (Can you believe that picture below is Daniel's?!? He has come so far in his interest and ability in drawing in just a few months!)

And finally, unrelated to a weekend, but the kids' school pictures have arrived. I am completely biased and will say that they are absolutely precious.

We're off to Wichita this weekend....stay tuned for our adventures there! ;)