Schlitterbahn vs. City Park Pool! Who Will Win?!*
* This battle is modeled after one of my favorite children's books ever, Shark vs. Train. Unlike this blog post, this book is pure genius.
1. Convenience
Schlitterbahn is a new water park in Kansas City, KS, which is about a 2-hour drive from our home in Manhattan. City Park Pool is located about an 11-minute drive from our house if traffic is particularly bad. Both are open beginning around Memorial Day. However, City Pool will probably close on August 1st or something equally ridiculous this year, meaning that when it gets to be a record-breaking heat wave, the pool will be closed and unavailable.
Winner: Tie
2. Cost
I was able to purchase tickets to Schlitterbahn online ahead of time to save a few dollars. For two adults, two children, plus tax, it come out to be....42 Gazillion Dollars. The last time we went to City Pool, it was during the "twilight special" (aka between 6 and 8 p.m.), and the grand total for our family was...$4. If we don't go during the twilight hours, we are able to use our punch cards from last year (or maybe the year before last...) which because I now have no recollection of ever purchasing them, are effectively Free.
Winner: City Park Pool
3. Life Guards
I think that lifeguards are a good measure of a water park's safety, which every parent values for his or her young children. As to be expected, Schlitterbahn had many life guards scattered throughout the park. However, I am convinced that City Park Pool has even more lifeguards - and not just per head. In total.
Winner: City Park Pool
4. Refreshments
Schlitterbahn has two great things going for it: (1) It lets you you bring in picnics (and yet we still succumbed and purchased Dippin Dots, The Ice Cream of the Future!, for our children...) and (2) it serves alcohol. And not just any alcohol - a swim-up bar in the water, that is located in the same area as the children's play area. This strategic bar placement signifies that Schlitterbahn is well aware of its target audience. City Park Pool, shockingly, neither sells nor permits alcohol to be purchased.
At first blush, it would appear that Schlitterbahn would win due to the fact that It Serves Fruity Drinks!! However, closer inspection showed that almost no one in the entire park appeared to be actually getting anything at the bar. I surmised that this must be because the alcoholic drinks also cost 42 Gazillion Dollars. I also surmised that it would be a bad idea for me to drink, since swimming and keeping track of children are things that I am not skilled at even while sober.
Winner: Tie
5. Family Experience
We had a lovely time at Schlitterbahn and literally everything we did there we did all together as a family. None of the water is ever above 3 feet in the park and there are copious life jackets and free inner tubes available all over the park. It is pretty amazing that we spent 5 hours together and all four of us were very happy almost 99% of the time (as Annika put it, "The Complaints Department is Closed!"). City Park Pool definitely has a lot of activities that families can do together but the water is just deep enough that one of us needs to carry Daniel around the whole time.
Winner: Schlitterbahn
6. Child Entertainment
Schlittbahn had several really neat kid play areas, where the kids ran around and had a blast while Will and I soaked our feet in the water and chilled. City Park Pool also has a lot of great play areas, but it is a little harder as an adult to just sit there, at least without getting sprayed in the face.
Winner: Schlitterbahn (by a nose)
7. Lap Swimming
As a water park, Schlitterbahn lacks any ability to lap swim. In addition to the more devoted "water park-y area," City Park Pool boasts a fabulous 50-meter Olympic-sized swimming pool that is perfectly set up for lap swimming. Unfortunately, seeing this pool and other people swimming laps only serves to remind me that swimming isn't just about floating around and splashing in the water, but is in fact exercise. The absence of a lap pool means that there is no guilt about splashing without exercising.
Winner: Tie
8. Parking
We were pleasantly surprised to find out that Schlitterbahn had "free" parking (as in, we did not have to pay to park, but I am sure the 42 Gazillion Dollar ticket price serves to subsidize the lot). City Park Pool does not charge for parking in its establishment, either (and while it might seem obvious that a municipality would not charge for parking, our time in Florida proved that Not All Do).
Winner: Tie
9. Lazy River
I think our favorite thing about Schlitterbahn were all of the really cool wave pools, lazy rivers, roaring rivers, and river rides that were all connected to each other. It was possible to go around the entire park riding in inner tubes and going from one area to the next without getting out of the water. The wave pool was also fabulous - there was a "wave machine" that created "tidal waves" in the water at regular intervals and it was a blast to float around on the waves. City Park Pool also has a really nice lazy river (as well as a separate "surfing" area) but it can't compete in this arena. :)
Winner: Schlitterbahn
10. Child Exhaustion Factor
The visit to Schlitterbahn wore Daniel out so much that he was out cold as soon as we made it back on the highway. While going to the City Pool always wears our children out, I have never experienced exhaustion at this level upon departure.
Winner: Schlitterbahn
Overall Winner: Schlitterbahn (by a nose and a half). It does cost 42 Gazillion Dollars but it was a blast for the whole family.
Other than our fun at Schlitterbahn, we also had a great time hanging out with both sets of Will's parents, and Will and I ran in a 5k road race in Eudora this morning. It was a very cute small-town race with homemade monster cookies at the finish - winning!
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