My Don't Do List: Special Holiday Edition

It is impossible to carry on every tradition of our own youth, our partner's youth, and our offspring's childhood and still maintain some semblance of sanity. Therefore, in honor of the impending holiday season, I present My Don't Do List: Special Holiday Edition. 

10. Elf on a Shelf
This is something that has exploded in popularity the past decade. I am sure our children would have loved the Elf on a Shelf; there something inherently fun about trying to find the Elf each morning and seeing what surprises are in store. However, as someone who has forgotten to leave Tooth Fairy money three nights in a row, there is no way I could have implemented this without it being an epic fail. 

9. Cookies for Santa or Reindeer Food
I had a lovely conversation  my daughter initiated approximately five years ago where we talked about how Santa is a really fun, magical tradition that parents get the joy of implementing. Her first comment was, "Does that mean that parents eat the cookies left for Santa??" I was surprised by this, given that we never, ever, ever left cookies for Santa, or the new tradition of "reindeer food." Stores close on Christmas Eve at 6 p.m. and the thought of getting cookies does not enter my mind until well past that hour.

8. Take Down the Tree at a Reasonable Time
We consider ourselves the most awesome organized people ever if we can manage to take our Christmas tree down by Epiphany, on January 6. One year I think it might have actually been April before all of the decorations went away. I am justifying this by the fact that this year, we have not actually put up our tree yet... 

7. Save Wrapping Paper
Rather than attempting to save wrapping paper for re-use, it all gets thrown away and dumped in landfills in giant trash bags. I apparently have shockingly little concern for the environment.

6. Drink Egg Nog
I think that the idea of egg nog is lovely- a fun, creamy drink that only gets brought out each year between Thanksgiving and New Year's. The actual taste, however, is....not so lovely.

5. Start Christmas Shopping Early
Our tradition is to wait until after finals and semester grades are turned in before worrying about Christmas shopping, in accordance with our "One Stress at at Time" family plan. This ended up backfiring this year, though, as several deadlines came up prior to grades being due. A 

4. Buy All Christmas Presents Locally
I love the idea of buying all of our Christmas presents locally and supporting our Manhattan economy. I love our town and think small businesses are its lifeblood. And yet, this year, we have a shockingly large number of Amazon Prime deliveries from stress-induced shopping deadlines. 

3. Write Letters to Santa. Or visit Santa in the mall. Or heck, just about anything involving Santa.
Neither of our children ever visited Santa....because who wants to spend more time in the mall than absolutely necessary during the Christmas season? It shows how strong the societal norm is toward Santa that our children were strong believers for years when we put zero effort into anything Santa related.

2. Read The Night Before Christmas (regularly)
I once asked my husband for suggestions on what our family doesn't do for the holidays, and he said that we don't read The Night Before Christmas on Christmas Eve. I was shocked because I consider this one of the things we actually *do* do, but he had the good point that it is pretty hit or miss, and mainly miss. So even holiday traditions that I think we do, we actually don't....

1. Have anything for Christmas breakfast. 
Our tradition is to visit Kansas City relatives for a few days before Christmas, drive back to Manhattan late on Christmas Eve, wake up the next morning in Manhattan on Christmas before driving to Wichita, and realize we are completely out of milk or any other breakfast-related item for Christmas breakfast. This year, I am trying to plan ahead and come up with a special breakfast, but, shockingly, both children said they would be fine eating "cereal" or "nothing." Perhaps some traditions are just not needed.