This is a post that has been brewing around in my head for quite a while, but for which I have hesitated to write down because I am unsure how well my fragmented thoughts would translate into paper.
I am not a Sports Mom. I do not spend my summers at the ballpark, my weekends at the soccer field, or my evenings shuttling around the kids to sports practices. And as with so many aspects of parenting, I have very mixed feelings on this, such as:
10. I did not imagine this pre-kids. Before we had children, my husband and I had many opinions on the best way to raise them. One of the things we agreed on was the importance of exposing our as-yet-non-existent children to sports - you learn teamwork! And goal-setting! And lifetime fitness habits! And did I mention teamwork! We figured we would spend more energy reining in our kids' desires than in trying to find something, anything, that was a physical activity that they enjoyed.
9. It isn't for lack of trying. Between the two of them, our children have been exposed to a parade of organized extracurricular physical activities, including gymnastics, ballet, tap dance, t-ball, softball, soccer, martial arts, horseback riding, running club, cross country, swimming lessons, and basketball.
8. Our kids have really only enjoyed two organized physical activities: swimming lessons and basketball - which is fantastic given that we own a pool, and that they have found a winter sport (basketball) that they enjoy when it is hard to get other kinds of physical activity. But both of these are ones that they enjoy much more in a recreational than in an organized environment.
7. Most physical activity is through family activities. In addition to swimming and basketball, our kids also enjoy family bike rides, and get dragged along on many hikes (and sometimes runs), but again, most of their physical activities are through activities that we do as a family, rather than organized events.
6. I worry about our kids being ostracized for not enjoying most sports. This is a completely ridiculous thing to admit, but I worry that because our kids do not enjoy playing or following or watching or learning most sports, that it will be harder for them to make a connection with peers. And I especially worry about this with our son, which is totally gender-biased, but a worry that is what it is.
5. I worry about lifetime fitness habits with our kids. Particularly as my daughter approaches middle school and it becomes even harder to try new organized physical activities if you are not athletically inclined, I worry about our kids staying in shape when the organized activities that they enjoy doing the most (such as drawing) are not fitness-oriented.
4. I enjoy having time together as a family. I love going to church together as a family every Sunday. I love the ability to have an impromptu family game night in the evening. I love that my husband and I can throw ourselves into volunteering at church or school or 4-H without worrying about how sports schedules will interfere.
3. I enjoy avoiding "sports politics." Parks and Rec? Wildcat League? One of the three soccer clubs in our small town? It's all moot to me!
2. I still sometimes find myself jealous of other kids' love of sports. This is very hard to admit. We drive by ball fields at night and I find myself wistful of other kids out there enjoying the game. I see kids lighting up with joy during dance recitals or soccer matches and I find myself wondering, "What If?" I think this kind of jealousy or Keeping Up With The Joneses or whatever you call it is terrible and toxic and does no one one single bit of good. But I would be lying if I said that I never felt these emotions at times.
1. I wouldn't trade any of this for watching my own kids' interests explode. Our children light up joy with so many things. They both love to draw. They love to build with Legos. They love doing science experiments and going to museums and watching documentaries. They love to go fishing. They love imaginative play and fantasy worlds. They love biking and swimming - albeit not in an organized environment. And I love them to the depths of my soul and wouldn't trade any of that for the world.
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